The meeting was opened by the secretary (that’s the Mayor’s ex wife) First item was a prayer by Reverend Goodby. There were 42 people in attendance in council chambers.  (note that the same 42 people were at every council meeting) The Mayor was seated and immediately called for the Sergeant at Arms to appear.  The Mayor asked the Sergeant at Arms why he had a 22 oz ball pein hammer instead of a gavel.  The Sergeant at Arms reported that by statute the gavel and block were required to be made out of zebra wood from South America.  He further reported that zebra wood had been placed on the endangered species list and could not be legally imported into the U.S.   It should be noted here that the Sergeant at Arms did NOT mention that the Mayor broke the gavel and block in last months’ council meeting.  But he did say that a change to the law was in committee at the Capitol, but was ‘stuck” because of all the riders attached to the “2016 Gavel Reconciliation Bill”.  The Sergeant at Arms allowed that it was not uncommon for  bills such as this to have completely unrelated riders for representatives’ pet projects since the bill was certain to be passed.  As an interim solution he suggested waiting until the fall rainy season when Fairhope2 would likely be in Illinois again.  Since Illinois did not have restrictions on the material used for the gavel and block they could pick up one on Ebay..  He also mentioned that the 22 ounce ball pein hammer was brand new and purchased at Harbor Freight Tools in Louisville.  The Mayor frowned,  stared at the shiny new yellow 22 oz ball pein hammer from Harbor Freight tools in Louisville that was in his hand with all the malice he could muster, and opened the meeting with a crack on the block. Old business Placing the population count on city limits signs The Public Works Director gave a report on the posting of the population on the city limit signs.  He reported that the three sets of magnetic numbers had arrived and the population numbers had been posted as required.  The Mayor smiled for the first time in the council meeting after hearing the good news.  The smile quickly disappeared when the Public Works Director began his next sentence with “However.....”.  The Public Works Director confessed that 8 years ago there was a rusting problem on city limit signs throughout Kentucky.  As a result in 2011 all the city limit signs in the state had been replaced with aluminum signs in accordance with the  revised KRS statute.  He further reported that since magnets are not attracted to aluminum the numbers would not stick.  The Mayor summoned the Public Works Director to his desk for a conference.  There was a lot of mumbling, grousing and waving of arms at this point, but the words “duct tape” seemed to capture the gist of what was said. The First Ward Councilman woke up and took the floor.  He suggested painting the prior census number on each sign preceded by a “tilde grapheme squiggly”.  The sign could then be updated once every ten years.  No one was quite sure what a “tilde grapheme squiggly” was, but it sounded like a good idea, and besides it wouldn’t need to be changed but once a decade.  Motion passed 5 to 0. Sidewalks in front of Sister Patience’ property on Greer Street. The Public Works Director presented the proposal to implement the decision of last month’s council meeting to elevate the sidewalks by two steps up across Sister Patience’ property in order not to damage the roots of her oak tree.  The project would involve two steps up on the south side and two steps down on the north side and had the following requirements:  1) Two steps on the north and south sides using ADA compliant steps, dual railings, treads and prevailing wage.  2)  Acquisition of property in Sister Patience’ front yard in the north and south to build a total of two sets of ADA compliant switchback ramps.  Each leg of the ramp to be no less than 30 feet long and 4 1/2 feet wide with braking railings in the switchbacks, gutters and storm water drains and state approved stormwater drainage ponds.  Measures to prevent canadian goose habitat was not included in the proposal.  3)  Concrete piers for the bridgework - 12 each  4) I beams to span piers - 12 each  5) Preformed concrete for spans  6) Railings for elevated sidewalk  7) Lighting as required for bridges and ramps  8) Contract for annual bridge inspections from 2015 through 2019 Total incremental cost would be $892,547.84 over and above the cost of a regular sidewalk  Silence.                More silence.                                                  One could have heard a budget break.  Sister Patience, who was in chambers began waving her arm trying to get the floor.                 The Mayor interrupted the silence by calling for a private caucus of council in the anteroom.  Sister Patience had resorted to calling “Wait, Wait...”, as the council retreated to the anteroom.  About  ~ (<-- that’s a tilde grapheme squiggly) 25 minutes later they emerged with a red-faced Public Works Director . The Public Works Director announced that the project had taken a different turn and the city was going to install a regular sidewalk and plant three oak trees for Sister Patience.  Total cost over and above the cost of regular sidewalks, $1,995.  Sister Patience continued waving her arm and finally got the floor.  She announced that she didn’t care at all about the tree in her front yard; that its roots had clogged her sewer pipes three times in the last five years; that she didn’t even want the tree in her yard, but she was afraid that if the roots were damaged that the tree would die and then perhaps fall down on her house.  The Fourth Ward Councilman immediately made a motion that the city cut the tree down and install the sidewalk per the original plan approved in September 2014.  The motion passed 5-0.  Three people volunteered to cut the tree down for free if they could have the firewood.  Total cost over and above the cost of a regular sidewalk  $ zero dollars. NEW BUSINESS The Second Ward Councilman made a motion to extend the deadline for applications to be on the ballot in November from July 31 to September 31.  The council approved the motion 5-0.  The City Attorney looked at the calendar on his cell phone, frowned and started to raise his hand, but changed his mind. Brother Samuel, who had recently moved to Fairhope2 from Metcalfe County had a question about the election.  He wanted to know who were the Republicans and who were the Democrats.  The Mayor seemed a little puzzled and replied as follows:  “Why, here in Fairhope2 we’re not Republicans or Democrats, we’re just neighbors.”  That comment received a very rare round of applause from 40 of the 42 people in the chambers.  The Mayor, quite pleased with himself, did not try to call the meeting back to order until the applause died down. The Third Ward Councilman, who was waving a copy of the Fairhope2 budget for Fiscal Year 2016 made a motion that the city income tax for 2016 be reduced by 8% since the city had showed a budget surplus for the last 4 years and was predicting a surplus in 2016.  The motion was passed 5-0.  The First Ward Councilman had initially objected, saying that it should be 10%, but council opted for the 8% cut. The City Safety Director requested funding for a survey of traffic lights in the city to see if the traffic control was adequate.  The Director was authorized to spend up to $3 995 for a survey. The Third Ward Councilman reminded the Council that July 15 was Reverend Goodby’s birthday. The Second Ward Councilman reminded the Council that the bi-annual swearing in of Sheriff’s Deputies was set to occur in August and that the ceremony would be somewhat larger than two years ago since there would be 14 new Deputies. The Second Ward Councilman made a motion to put three sets of magnetic numbers up for sale on Craig’s List.  Motion passed 5-0. With all new business complete, the Mayor declared the meeting over and rapped the block with his shiny new, yellow, 22 ounce yellow ball pein hammer which was purchased at Harbor Freight Tools in Louisville. The meeting adjourned at 8:17 p.m. On his way out the door the Mayor tossed the shiny, new, yellow handle, 22 ounce ball pein hammer that was recently purchased in Louisville at Harbor Freight Tools in the trash can.